How To Write An Epic Toast (tips from a Videographer who eats, sleeps and breaths them) + free guide
Updated: Oct 16, 2019
So You've been asked to be the Best Man or Maid of Honor, HOW EXCITING! ..... Or is it!? Let the nail biting begin...
Now you have to get up in front of a room full of strangers and entertain them! You start panicking! What are you going to say?! How long should you talk for?! What if no one laughs at your jokes?!
Well, have no fear! I am here to tell you everything you need to know to write an Epic Toast! And trust me when I say I know what I'm talking about!
Keep it Short, Sweet and to the point!
The party isn't going to start until All the formalities (First Dance, Parent Dances, Toasts, etc.) are done and dinner is served! This can take a while (sometimes 2 hours!) and people want to get to the fun stuff already so don't ramble on for a year!
If you're going to share a personal memory of you and the Bride or Groom Pick 1!
This is a big mistake I see at weddings, People will ramble on and on about memories and inside jokes that NO ONE in the audience relates to or cares about. Remember, this day is about the couple and not your friendship with the Bride or Groom and this toast isn't your moment to shine and talk about what a great friend you are!
If you do decide to share a story it should either be funny, evoke emotion, or somehow speak to the character of the person you are toasting. (And it shouldn't be an hour long)
Tell the audience all the nice qualities about your best friend!
The wedding guests might not have been there for all your inside jokes but they are there because they're loved by the couple and will definitely share mutual feelings with you about your BFF!
If you're funny be funny, If love oozes out of you with every word you say let it ooze! But don't try to be something your not! A lot of times the toaster will think they have to make a joke and then bomb or make people uncomfortable! (Which brings us to my next tip)
Don't be overly concerned with being funny
50% of people (a statistic I just made up) get up there and think they are a comedian, and coming from someone who at one point in their lives dabbled in stand up comedy (that's not a joke) most of the time they are not funny at all! You are better off saying something heartfelt, focus on that, and if you make a joke here or there, great!
Talk about the reason you are there!
I am absolutely baffled when the toaster fails to talk about the couple! Without their love this day would not be possible so you better mention it in your toast! (especially for your videographer because this is typically the section that makes it into the highlight film) This should be the core of your speech, if you forgot to introduce yourself or button you pants but you remembered this section of your toast you are winning my friend!
Some ideas to expand on: (Feel free to touch on all of these points
Memory of when couple first met
Your memory of first meeting their spouse
How their relationship made them better people
How their relationship made them the happiest people in the Universe
How happy you are that they found each other!
Welcome them to the family
Do Not, I repeat DO NOT roast your BFF!
Let's just be nice, its their wedding day! You can't go wrong with a kind and heartfelt word. However, you could go very VERY wrong, very quickly if you decide to get mean!
And for Goodness sake please do not start your toast with
"For those of you who don't know me!"...
If I hear this one more time I might explode! (OK I am over exaggerating but this is a common pet peeve among professionals in the wedding industry!)
If you would be so obliged, here is an alternate way to open up your toast! (You'll even impress your videographer ;)
"My name is (insert name here) and I am (relation to bride or groom)"...
See was that so hard!? And the people who don't know you are aware of the fact that they don't know you without you ever mentioning it!!!
I hope this article is helping you feel a little bit better about writing your speech..Now get to work!
Just remember this one thing, if you tell the groom to put his hand on the brides and then say this is the last time you will have the upper hand, I will hunt you down........and........probably........roll my eyes at you? I mean I'm not a violent person. lets be real! Let's just not do that, OK? Then we'll both be happy!
But wait theres more, a little treat for you! You're Welcome!
Here is an example of some amazing toasts! I actually had a hard time picking and choosing what made it into the highlight because they were that good!
But Now that you are an expert (because you read a 5 min article) you'll have a better appreciation for this film. You will hear a lot of the key elements I mentioned above and see just how the right words tug at those heart strings!
Venue: Downtown Club Philadelphia
Photographer: Lurey Photography
Videographer: Alyssa Kaufman Films
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